February 5, 2013

Oh, motherhood

THIS post was SOOOO helpful for me today!  I definitely needed to be reminded that it is fine if Everett doesn't sleep through the night yet (and likes to sometimes wake up every two hours..STILL and likes to breastfeed A LOT.... ).

I keep going back and forth as to wether I want to do some form of controlled crying but then I always decide he's not ready.  I am not against controlled crying and I still don't know what we'll do down the road, but right now, Everett is 5 months old and he is doing his thing.  I am home with him for a reason.  I made the right decision to not go back to work and we are going to be just fine.  We've made a lot of sacrifices for me to be able to take time off from teaching, I am happy about it.

It is so easy to get wrapped up in what Everett SHOULD be doing...especially when it comes to sleep.  He is doing great with all his other milestones...he's rolled over, but he doesn't do it on command...because he doesn't need to prove to me that he can do it...he just does it when he feels like doing it...

Last night he slept for a four hour chunk, ate, and then slept for a three hour chunk, decided to get up at 6 and wanted to be back in bed by 7:30....ALL totally new things he's never done...he didn't even sleep with us last night...Like the post so wonderfully explains, I have a human baby, not a robot baby and I prefer it.  I prefer my need to read his cues and just enjoy the ride.  Sometimes he wants to sleep peacefully with us...sometimes he kicks and flails around when sleeping with us and so he needs to sleep in his own space next to us...I have no where to be and no one to answer to so I am going to enjoy this time away from the working world and just be a momma.

I love being Everett's mom, but I think lately I have started to get so bogged down with others questioning his habits and then my own stupid hangups of comparing him with what the good people on the web think he should be doing.  Lesson learned...I think I have just reached my limit of seeking out what everybody else says about what Everett should be doing and eating and how long he should be sleeping and I am just going to pay attention to what Everett has to say on the matter.  I will look up information and ask others another time...right now I need to just relax and enjoy this little human that I have the privilege to get to know and care for.